Kutcher Enters the Building

 Ashton Kutcher is known for many things. Demi Moore's cub of a husband, the dumb one on That 70s Show and finally the guy who played all the pranks on Punk'd. Now he's gunning for a new role, the new rich heartbreaker on Two and a Half Men.
 Two and Half Men premiered last night and from all the buzz, it may not have been that funny but it sure was interesting. Charlie Harper (Charlie Sheen) died on the train tracks in Paris after running away with the crazy neighbor Rose (Melanie Lynskey). Of course, there was every woman Charlie had a significant relationship (meaning more than1 night) with at the funeral as well.
 Charlie and Alan's( John Cryer) mom (Holland Taylor) also tries to pocket quick money from the sale of the house and has some familiar buyers stop in. John Stamos as a former associate of Charlie, who is haunted by a painful memory. And then there's Dharma (Jenna Elfman) and Greg (Thomas Gibson) reprising their famous roles. Finally, when Alan is memorializing Charlie's ashes, Walden Schmidt (Ashton Kutcher) shows up after attempting suicide.
 Walden is depressed and trying to drown himself in the ocean after his wife leaves him, but unfortunately gets too cold and decides to go to Alan's place to try and rectify things with his ex. To no avail, he doesn't succeed but ends up getting a drink with Alan and gets into some familiar antics.
 By the end of the episode, Walden decides to buy the house. Luckily for Alan, he will not have to move in with his mother and suffer the humiliation of being a broke chiropractor, however he will suffer the humiliation of being 2nd banana to Walden.
 The jokes unfortunately were too crude and when they were funny, it was few and far between. Ashton Kutcher is gentler because he has the sort of sensitive man appeal that could garner more female viewers. However, the still running sex gags are old and not even clever. What I didn't understand was that Walden was so initially disgruntled with his life he couldn't love a woman, so how did he suddenly become up for a threesome? I don't think that's how it usually works. John Cryer was of course genius as usual being the depressingly awkward straight man.
 This could work for at least one more season, but I think it's seriously time for CBS to break up with Two and a Half Men.